I can do this. I will do this.

So I needed to write a post to convince myself that I CAN work hard and I WILL pass my exams with the grades I hope to achieve. I just need to have it written down somewhere so that I stick to my plan, so that I keep working despite whatever distractions might come my way.

I always make goals but I never make a plan to get to those goals. But that needs to change from now on. I have my internals in a week. Yes. I’ve accepted that. I have 6 subjects to revise for. 6 subjects for which I need to practise past paper questions and understand concepts. In one week. 

I do accept that all the time spent in Grade 11 this year has been preparing me for these exams, and I also accept that I need to put in my own effort in order to do well. And I will. 

If not for me, then for my parents. For my teachers. I know they have expectations of me and I DO want to live up to those expectations and EXCEEDthem.

And of course, for the special someone who I met just a little over a week ago. I WANT to be able to introduce her to my parents, I WANT them to see her as more than just some distraction in my life. I WILL make sure that I do well. If not for anyone else, then DEFINITELY for her. She is worth EVERY bit of effort I put into doing well.

At the same time, I should also realise that failure DOES NOT mean the end of the world. It just means there’s some room for improvement. But I should not use this as an excuse to become complacent with the effort I’m putting in now. I CAN DO MORE. I WILL DO MORE.